It’s different for girls, right? When women get objectified, it’s bad, right? Straight porn exploits women, and club nights that allow women in for free as eye candy are sexist, RIGHT??
I was looking at this interesting new project by Kinkster Kitty Stryker, the Andro-Aperture project. It is all about encouraging women to find/produce/enjoy images of men being sexy.
That is all well and good but it is framed within that old feminist trope, the ‘female gaze’. Where men looking at women is seen as riddled with power relations, but women looking at men is liberating. As for men looking at each other or themselves? That is not mentioned.
Anyway Kitty included this review of a launch party for a raunchy magazine called Candy Rain. Do you think it sounds misandrist? I do!
‘Last night I attended the launch party for the second issue of Candy Rain Magazine, a glossy little treasure trove of cock shots geared towards “ladies who love the D.” (For those playing along at home, that stands for “dick.”) There were scantily clad people gettin’ it on all over the place. There were water guns. There was burlesque. There was booty rap. And yes, there were dicks, and lots of them. In a jarring reversal of spring break culture, guys could show their dicks to get in for free. Wooooo!
“Here at Candy Rain, we have a simple policy” one of the party’s organizers yelled into the mic at one point. “Show us your dick or get the fuck out!!!” Despite the fact that the blood was supposed to be rushing to my crotch at this point, this made me think. How would I feel if some guy yelled “show us your tits or get the fuck out”? Not very good, I reckon. In objectifying men like this, one might argue Candy Rain apes the worst aspects of the patriarchy. Shouldn’t feminism be working towards a world in which nobody gets objectified?
Not necessarily! I talked with my friend Ann* about this a little, and we decided we were into it. You see, despite the fact that they were showing their bodies off for our (adult) entertaiment that night, men still have all the power. So even if they were being objectified in an uncomfortable way for a few hours, it said nothing about the underlying system in place. It’s simply not the same. It’s like that medieval holiday where the masters served the servants; it was hilarious because it was so unusual, and everything went back to the way it had been shortly thereafter’
I don’t know what to do. I am tired of going over to blogs and getting into arguments, or blocked and ignored as I often am. I am tired of sounding like Mark Simpson’s poodle.
Men’s objectification of themselves and their metrosexual self-love seems too much for some women to bear. So they pretend it doesn’t exist. And make up a load of shit about men and women in the process.
Maybe as Camille Paglia calls it, I have a bad case of Big Daddy Syndrome and I want MetroDaddy to come in and sort out these little madams once and for all. I know he won’t. I know too, that I can fight my own battles, and his work is just one more gun in my holster.
But I am war weary.