Different for girls?

Posted: June 16, 2011 in Identity, Masculinities
Tags: , ,

http://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2011/06/12/androcentrism-its-okay-to-be-a-boy-but-being-a-girl/

This analysis on sociological images of what it means for men to present as ‘feminine’ misses the point on so many levels I can’t even begin to write about them.  It is yet another case of Whatabouttehwimmin?

Update

In the comments I said:

One thing that bugs me is it takes a positive thing for girls-that they are more free than men to ‘cross dress’ and turns it into a negative. Saying it is because being a girl is so shameful no boy would want to look like one. When in fact boys and men are looking more like gilrls and women, and going to nail bars and having facials and even wearing some make up, without the world falling apart.

Comments
  1. redpesto says:

    This is an old argument – we’ll just overlook the boys with ‘long’ hair, glam rock, goth and androgynous male actors/pop stars. It’s the criticisms of ‘forced femininity’ in BDSM play (cf Bitchy Jones, passim.) It’s even cropped up within debates on lesbianism re. butch/femme. And no, the answer is not to get men in skirts.

  2. typhonblue says:

    white people can wear tweed and lacoste

    play golf and badminton

    but for a black person to act like a white person is degrading

    because you think being a white person is degrading.

    I second the call that this ‘analysis’ misses the mark by a wide margin.

  3. redpesto says:

    Typhonblue – have you ever seen a photo of Chris Eubank? Plus, Eldridge Cleaver pointed out that ‘Whitey’ argued that black people couldn’t play golf – I think Tiger Woods settled that one.

  4. arctic_jay says:

    If this argument were true, then society would never have developed gender roles as both girls and boys would have been encouraged to act like “boys” in the first place.

  5. redpesto says:

    So the link criticises the reluctance of men to embrace a ‘femininity’ that feminism itself discourages in women (in favour of what, exactly? it just looks like the ended up with ‘boyish’ by default). And do we really want to do the debate about ‘passing’ and agency while we’re at it? If disguising yourself as a boy means you get to be Pope (according to legend), what does dressing as a girl get you?

  6. elflojo84 says:

    That’s typical feminism. Taken at face value, what is the sex of every individual adversely affected by this social hypocrisy? Male. So this is clearly sexist. Of Course. Against women … er … what?? Yes, against women. Um … how?

    *insanely convoluted explanation based on vague notions of ‘patriarchy’ and soem weird pre-conceived ideas about social attitudes*

    Right. So, the best you can prove is that it has negative connotations for women as well as men.

    I can basically go with that, most gender-related hypocrisies in society do affect both sexes, almost by definition because both sexes are (contrary to feminist insistence that we are fundamentally different “classes” of people) inexorably intertwined. Feminist theory relies on working out how this affects women badly, then dismissing how it affects men badly as irrelevent because a tiny minority of men are the more powerful politicians and the boardromm executives and whathaveyou.

    The different roles of men and women in terms of childcare is a classic example. How many feminists do we hear whinging about how women are “expected to stay home and look after the baby” and how awful this is for them, while those lucky men get to leave the house at 6AM, work their arses off all day then get home after their beloved children have gone to bed? Millions. What proportion of men would actualyl rather be at work than seeing their children. A tiny, tiny proportion. And frankly, those women whose husbands ARE like that – you shouldn’t have marreid him in the first place.

  7. Hi all
    One thing that bugs me is it takes a positive thing for girls-that they are more free than men to ‘cross dress’ and turns it into a negative. Saying it is because being a girl is so shameful no boy would want to look like one. When in fact boys and men are looking more like gilrls and women, and going to nail bars and having facials and even wearing some make up, without the world falling apart.

    • L. Ron Weasley says:

      I always used to argue with one of my exes that even since the (first) Summer of Love in the 60’s men were experimenting with ‘feminine’ appearances, i.e. growing their hair long and in the case of Robert Plant, wearing blouses, tight trousers and other feminine clothing. I’m sure he wasn’t the only one, but I’m just using him as an example.

      Granted, I used to do this to wind her up on purpose because she hated Zeppelin, but the overall point I thought was solid.

      Men experiment/have experimented with their appearance all the time. I myself dabbled in eyeliner during my dodgy Manics phase in my late teens. In retrospect, I looked terrible. Thankfully Facebook wasn’t around then.

  8. Jim says:

    “The different roles of men and women in terms of childcare is a classic example. How many feminists do we hear whinging about how women are “expected to stay home and look after the baby” and how awful this is for them, while those lucky men get to leave the house at 6AM, work their arses off all day then get home after their beloved children have gone to bed…”

    Flojo, the androcentrism of what Second Wave feminism valued and evalued is quite striking. If men were doing it, it was to be wanted; if women were doing it, it was worthless. The Mommy Wars and Goddess feminism erupted out of this finally, but they did not clear out this underlying assumption in so much of mainstream feminist discourse.

    • elflojo84 says:

      Thankfully they have realised the error of their ways, and we now have a situation where SOME things men do (such as being in prison) are not so much fun, so obviously the systems are meritocratic, whereas OTHER things men do (such as being in parliament) are sexist, and, like, patriarchy and 6% rape convictions and junk, so women must be forcibly inserted there.

  9. Steph D says:

    I find the message behind that poster personally offensive. Oh nowadays being offended means I can get some money off someone right?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s