The ‘W’ Word.

Posted: November 2, 2010 in Uncategorized

The fact is I should be writing my novel but the characters are  not my favourite people right now. It’s not their fault they just reminded me, via somebody else in ‘RL’, no, scrap that, not real life, the internets of course, how actually these clever inventions I have made are really just thinly veiled versions of me. And other people in my life. Including Mr Foucault. Who sometimes is himself and sometimes isn’t. And I like fiction to be an escape from, and a window on reality as much as the next whore, but sometimes the window is too narrow and I can’t escape out of it. So I am locking the doors and closing the curtains and staying inside. But I promised I’d write so I write.

Whore. That’s the word I was thinking of. I often think of the word whore it is one of my favourite words. I like the way it conjurs up so many different images all at once. But they all come down to the same thing in the end, a woman with her legs open, waiting to be fucked. That’s what you see too isn’t it? I thought so.

The first time I got called ‘whore’ I was shocked. I think I may have blushed. I know it made my cunt throb a little.  It’s ok, Mr Foucault isn’t here now I can’t imagine him saying the word ‘cunt’ can you? But the novelty wore off after a while. words are like that aren’t they? You can use them so many times and then they lose their power. I have found that with words like ‘love’ and ‘sir’ and ‘discourse’ and ‘gender’. 

Where was I? Excuse me I am a bit tired. Oh yes, whore.

That whole Stephen Fry thing with the feminists. I got straight away how it was all about who was allowed to call men dirty dogs and who was allowed to say women are pure and honourable ladies and when gay men are acceptable and when they are dangerous perverts. And why women’s whole lives are led under the fear of being ravaged and raped and murdered by men. Yes, Germaine Greer crystallised that message with her idea that women would be in mortal danger if they went cottaging. In mortal danger of being ignored most likely.

Anyway the thing I missed out was how what the feminists were also insinuating was that nice ladies who are pretty enough and bright enough to have sex between ‘classy sheets’ and who don’t need to go out and fuck strangers in toilets, they are different and nicer than those other women. The whores. Whores do need to go out at night and fuck strange men and risk their lives in unlit streets with no husband to call to check they are ok. They need to not because they have an insatiable desire, but because they need the money. And luckily, those dirty dogs, men, are willing to pay. As Stephen made quite clear.

In a way,  I think Stephen and the feminists were both suggesting that whoring around, whether for cash or out of uncontrollable libido, isn’t such a great thing. But Stephen included himself in the whoring, however limp and lame his attempts at whoring may have been. The feminists distanced themselves from the whores, both gay and ‘female’. Because nice girls don’t.

That’s what I was thinking about when I was distracting myself from being pissed off that writing a novel is not an escape from reality at all. And neither is sex. And that bastard Foucault knew both of those facts, so I am not sure why I need to repeat them, especially not in a fictional, fucking format.

But thinking about whores always cheers me up. They remind me about being human. And about the whore inside me, that’s never been paid, not in cash, though I have drunk a lot of free wine and eaten a lot of free dinners, and sucked quite a few cocks that I wasn’t in a massive hurry to suck. Does that count? Do I count?

I hope Dan reads this. I love the way Dan starts writing about one thing and then the next minute he has darted down a dark passageway and I am running to keep up with him. And then he mentions someone he was talking to, in real life, and then it all gets a bit messy and I don’t know what is going to happen next.

I am not a very good whore. And sometimes I am a bit of a crap writer. But the fact I am proud to be both keeps me going.

P.s. Sebastian Horsley wasn’t called ‘Whoresly’ for nothing. He was a proud whore and a lover of whores, and if Stephen Fry loved Sebastian that’s ok by me.

Result: Feminists:0 Whores: 3

I still have a novel to write.

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Not an Odalisque, Elly . Elly said: New Post: The W Word. How to avoid writing a novel and get a bit emotional 2.0 […]

  2. danholloway says:

    I most certainly have read this (I am also running away from a novel :)) For me the word whore conjures up images of the court of Louis XVI, Shakespeare’s Nag’s Head, and Christopher Isherwood.
    I love that you raise the class question. It’s the hidden prejudice often considered irrelevant and dismissed from conversation. I remember once having a discussion with someone who said that now with the internet everyone could be a writer – there was a global level playing field. I ponited out that more people still don’t have clean water than do have access to the internet which was hardly global. An extreme example, but it’s everywhere – from prejudice against celeb biogs (most of these celebs are from working class backgrounds – the publishing industry overwhelmingly publishes the middle classes, even when writing about the working classes – celeb biogs are the only place to find books both about AND by the working classes) to the ludicrous double standards over John Diamond and Jade Goody – and you hit the nail on the head with this one.

    Thank you – still blushing after your Foucault tweet about my notebook entry 🙂

  3. yes there was a thng in the guardian this week about women role models and how young women deserve better than the ‘sex objects’ and ’emotional wrecks’ they get, e.g cheryl cole and katie price and britney spears and rihanna etc… and I thought well they are real women too. I have had more in common with all of them than I have with Bidisha and Germaine Greer in some ways. And their success shouldnt be less valid than those ‘good’ role models ie middle class ones.

    Foucault had some good lines but so do a lot of other people. The more you get to know a writer the more you appreciate other writers, I find!

  4. Jen says:

    I read that Stephen Fry interview and my first thought was that gay male dating practices historically came from a need for secrecy, women’s dating and marital practices from economic dependency on dudes (so basically he’s not all that wrong), and what’s so liberating about either of them? Essentially the feminists are mad at him for describing the situation of dependency a lot of women find themselves in. You try removing the ‘potential husband’ from the equation and before concerns about your can being ravaged by a murderous pleb in a public toilet, I think you’ll have concerns about how difficult it is to make ends meet. Then replace ‘potential husband’ with a woman and that’s where you start having concerns for your safety.

    Otherwise, had much the same thoughts as you on the whole thing, also with your first post about liberal folks being down with ‘gay culture’ and having gay friends and so on but when the shall we say practical realities become manifest the reaction is ‘eeewww’. I mean, I got much that reaction in feminist circles when I came out, and then came out in support of ‘pretend’ bisexual women saying that if it’s fun and exciting for them it’s okay by me, that if everyone involved is having fun then I wouldn’t even consider it ‘pretend’ and it’s just as ‘real’ as two chicks in friar tuck haircuts and academic gowns holding hands in a stately garden discussing the poetry of Sappho.

    That’s why I’m so keen to be emphatic about the aspects of queer women’s sexuality that can be considered ‘predatory’ or ‘misogynist’ in feminist circles (and in nice liberal circles generally) when they’re just – well, everyone’s fine with certain women not wanting to have sex with men, but the idea that some women are sexually attracted to women is quite horrifying and still considered very deviant, and you will usually get served the line ‘it’s not about sex, it’s about a special relationship to women’.

    yes there was a thng in the guardian this week about women role models and how young women deserve better than the ‘sex objects’ and ‘emotional wrecks’ they get, e.g cheryl cole and katie price and britney spears and rihanna etc… and I thought well they are real women too. I have had more in common with all of them than I have with Bidisha and Germaine Greer in some ways.

    Goodness, yes – I remember one press release on the F-Word about a ‘riot grrrl’ party (i.e. women-fronted rock or singer-songwritery stuff, or music by women that we approve of, i.e. not r’n b or girl group or anything like that) which was about how we want to dance to music by ‘women like us’ – ‘like us’ being white, middle-class, extremely rich with multi-million-selling records and married to a Beastie Boy, or a combination of all of those.

    But I mean that type of feminism is all about ‘respect the cock’ at the end of the day: concerns about protecting their capital and the purity of their genetic material (otherwise, they would have had a more feminist analysis of the actual immediate practical concerns that make women act in the way he describes). And if you don’t have any respect whatsoever for the cock, they turn into Tom Cruise on crack (did I need to specify ‘on crack’?) and start yelling sassy stuff at you.

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