Dear Boys, (Or, Men, if you prefer)
This is a brief note to say Sorry. And also thank-you.
You all responded to my questions about ‘men and feminism’ so honestly and in such detail. But as I was reading them, I heard about what actually happened at that UK Feminista summer school, which was much worse than even I had imagined it would be. Bidisha said feminism was all about being on ‘the girls’ team’. Julie Bindel said if she had one bullet she’d use it to shoot the academics who research into sex work.
And I myself lost the will to live. Not to live, but to think rationally and carefully about feminism, about men’s exclusion or otherwise from it.
Frankly I was amazed by your generosity to a movement, which, as far as I can see, ignores or vilifies you at every turn.
Andy V said I was not being ‘objective’ enough, by stating this belief before I had even asked the questions. I told him he was wrong. But I think he was right after all. I am still too upset and angry about feminism to write considered and, not objective, as I don’t believe in objectivity, but empathetic analysis of your words.
I am going to put this on hold until I have got some distance. Feminism will still be there, I am afraid when I come back, and, more pleasingly, so will men.
I really appreciate you making the effort to talk to me. Please feel free to come and reprimand me here for my failings!
It’s just sometimes it seems as though feminism thinks you are good for nothing whipping boys. And it makes me so unhappy.