Now Wash your Hands

Posted: June 26, 2010 in Masculinities

Take a final drag from your cigarette,

Before you let the bitch have it.

Summon the strength, the necessary power

To do the job. Kick down her door.


Think of your anger, rising within.

Make her the cause of all your pain.

Look at her snivelling, sneering expression.

Tonight you’re going to teach her a lesson


She’ll never forget. Concentrate.

Force her to look at you square in the face.

Next on the cheek you once gently kissed,

Accurately plant your fist.


Pull her towards you by the roots of her hair.

If she is screaming then do not hear.

See how her blood turns your hands red,

How strands of her hair stick to the blood.


Throw her down, onto the floor.

This is all she was ever good for.

Kick her, hard, in the small of her back

Till her body goes limp as if she’d been fucked.


Step back for a moment. Check she’s not dead.

Go in for one last punch in the head.

Ask her if this time she understands

Who’s boss. Now wash your hands.

  1. jelly292 says:

    Brilliant!. A disturbingly accurate insight into IPV. Reminds me of someone i once knew…

  2. Thank you!

    Sometimes we wish we didn’t have such insight into things. But once we do we may as well share our experiences/understanding.

  3. Joan Price says:

    So disturbing. Well written, and oh, so disturbing.

  4. Scheherezade says:

    Well-written, but I think I would have liked something to set it in context within the same blogpost. (I mean, I know that it is intended to be in direct and stark contrast to consensual stuff, but some people might not.)

  5. True. But as we have said, my writing gets deliberately misinterpreted all the time depending on people’s agenda.

    I prefer for my words to stand on their own.

  6. you know how on some kink sites they have things like ‘trigger warning’ or ‘this references rape or violence’ ? I just don’t like that way of flagging a piece of writing. I’d like to chat to other bloggers about it.

  7. Scheherezade says:

    Do they? But that’s not what I meant.

    I just meant, maybe a bit of background on how you came to write it and what it means to you.

    But on the other hand, it does ring true as what might be going on in an abusive bloke’s head, so if some people don’t get it, that may well be their problem and not yours.

    It’s just that, when I started reading it, I didn’t know where it was going, so it was all the more scary as a result when I realised where it was going (which was at line 4 of the first verse). But then a lot of the power of writing rests in exactly that uncertainty as to where a piece is going.

  8. Yes. I will think about it. I know other writers do put this kind of material in context. I was just getting a bit defensive as ALL my writing gets treated as ‘supporting violence against women’ by some feminists. Including ones whose comments I have had to block on this blog, as they are personal and insulting. But that’s the territory we are writing in!

  9. Thanks for the comment Joan Price!

  10. Hey, Riot!

    Thanks, for the poem! :O)

    & thanks for not insulting our intelligence with some kind of timid backing into the content. As they say in song writing: Don’t bore us, get to the chorus!

    Now, Okay–we can say, here’s the abuser’s mind. Fine. However, we can also say here’s where someone on the sending end of a very advanced “give & take” relationship might organize thinking.

    Check Faye Kane’s blog to see what I mean. She likes it beyond what most of us would call rough. & it’s refreshing & is an occasion for soul searching.

    She gets pissed if I DON’T give out her info. She’s also been discovering a gentler side–& getting rather pissed of at the discovery–go figure! 😛

    REALLY well written. I like how you concentrated on the moment-for-moment reality and gut feelings. Small solid words. Simple unadorned rhymes. I like the way your mind works.

    Rock on!

    Sunshine & Blessings,

  11. Oops!

    Faye’s moving to a new house (or whatever) & has closed-off her blog to new viewers for now.

    Sorry. 😛

  12. […] that part of my fascination with this pair, and the dynamic they sing about, stems from my own personal experience of violence in a relationship. The guy I rapped that particular duet with is not […]

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